I hate saying that. It feels so very wrong. It's not that I wouldn't like to help them. It's not that I am not appalled at what is happening over there. I have been wrestling with my guilty feelings lately. What have I done to make the world a better place? I started by taking inventory of the areas that I'd love to 'fix'. My to-do list looks like this:
Free Tibet
Heal the hole in the ozone layer
Cure Cancer
Save the endangered species
Overhaul the public school system
Raise my own kids
Defend the gays and lesbians
Teach people how to be happy
Solve world hunger
Find loving homes for the orphans
Save the rainforest
Rid the planet of pollution
Implement a clean economical fuel system
Design a quality inexpensive health care system
End divorces and broken homes
Clean out the political system
Create world peace
Find Atlantis and solve the mystery of the pyramids
Scientifically prove somebody's religion is true
Psychologically heal the inmates who want it
End all superficial fakeness
Save the children
Stop racism
Bring an end to lethargy
Stop terrorism
Save the coral reefs
Change America's focus from being 'politically correct' to becoming 'spiritually correct' and I'm not talking about religion
It all gets a bit overwhelming. How can I ever accomplish all of these things in my lifetime? Even if I delegate certain areas to my kids, and make them take a blood oath that they will force my grandkids to carry on with the work on this list until it is finished, I cannot possible hope to solve all of the world's problems. Then I got to thinking about getting up on my soapbox and preaching to everyone that they need to come help me. There is just so much that needs done and you and I both know that my list is not even complete. I would be lucky if I can do one of those things really well during my lifetime.
I had to sit and really think about my own resources, the natural gifts I was born with, and what amount of time I want to commit to doing good deeds. I had to analyze the list and what it would really take to accomplish each of those things. What I came to realize is that there are some that I am called to do, some that I just want to do, and still others that I secretly wish someone else would do. That's not a bad thing, it is what it is. I may really want to cure cancer and other diseases, but I know that deep down I don't have any resources, skills, training, or education to apply to the problem. It's really not my job. All I can do is to support those who are meant to do that work. If I had the money, I'd dump a fortune into their pockets to make sure they had all of the tools they needed. But I don't have it to give, not yet anyway.
What if I do a little bit for each and every one? They say, "Every little bit counts!" You know if all I was giving was my money, then I'd say yes. Donate money to all of those causes. But, that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about actually rolling up my sleeves and getting to work helping make the world a better place. I personally cannot fly all over the planet adding just a touch of my energy here and there. To truly create the huge changes needed to fix those problems, I would have to really give my undivided attention and focus. One hundred people giving a moment of their time is not as effective and powerful as just two or three people giving it all of their time and focus. If I am going to make a difference, then I will have to narrow the list down.
One by one, I had to scratch off the list those things that I personally could not do. That's not to say that I won't someday be able to help finance them. For now, I have to look at what I can actually roll my sleeves up and do with my own two hands. What are my talents best used for? What is my job? I picked from the list those things that were truly deeply mine. They are all areas that I also happen to feel a personal calling to be involved in. Everything else, I have to let go and trust that someone else will recognize that they have the talents and resources to become part of the solutions. I have to trust that whoever is meant to take on those jobs will feel a calling deep in their soul and that they'll heed that calling.
Another hard part for me is not knowing the divine plan. When bad things happen, we can sort of take comfort in knowing that there must be some divine reason. Somehow the challenges and dramas of life always lead to enlightenment, joy, new self esteem, or some other cosmic gift. Some things are meant to be. Some things are not meant to be. So, when I take that deep breath and trust that someone else is going to pick up that particular problem and give their life to solving it, I have to also make peace with the idea that it may not happen the way I would like to see it happen, or along the timeline that I'd like to see it happen. Who will free Tibet while I'm busy working on fixing these other things? Will they be saved in a timely manner? Will our government dive in to save them the way that they felt called to save other people? I can only pray that someone else picks up the baton because I cannot. Is it your job? Will you free Tibet?
Copyright 2004, Skye Thomas, Tomorrow's Edge
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